The Ministry of Defence has recently released secret files on supposed ‘UFO’ sightings. Covering the period from 1978 onwards, they include accounts of ‘unexplained objects and strange lights in the sky.’
I like to think I’m a fairly open minded guy, and I’m always open to new ideas, but having flicked through a few pages of the documents (which can be downloaded from the National Archives website) I think its hilarious and ridiculous that some of these sightings even make it into a story for your mates at the pub, let alone a full-scale MOD investigation.
One document reveals how in a pub in Tunbridge Wells, a group of staff and customers reported an unknown object with green and red flashing lights – seen heading in the direction of Gatwick Airport.
Now I’m no genius, and I don’t claim to be well learned in UFOlogy or aircraft recognition, but I do know that when I’ve had a few drinks down the pub I can’t see too well. I also know that planes happen to have red and green lights, and that they tend to land at airports.
I’d like to think that someone would have put two and two together and considered the outrageously unimaginable possibility that it could, in fact, just be a plane.
Alien activity also seems to crop up in areas where, let’s face it, the folk are a bit simple. I come from a small town in Devon, so I’m not exactly a metrosexual, sophisticated, high-flying city dweller, but I do know that the people of Kent, as well as Norfolk – which is famous (or indeed infamous) for its crop circles – tend to be one alien short of an invasion, and seem to be convinced that anything unexplainable is alien activity.
I think the thing that most amazes me is people’s readiness to accept the most outrageous possibility as the most likely explanation. Admittedly, if I were to stumble across a strange aircraft on the ground at night I would probably steer well clear of it and consider that, just maybe, it could be a UFO, but as a rationally-thinking human being I still think I would come up with a few better, more plausible ideas first.
In another article, one man explained in great detail his “physical and psychic contact” with green aliens since he was a child. I have a lot of problems with this story. First of all, ‘green aliens’ is such as cliché. If you’re going to make up a story, at least be original and say they have zebra stripes, flashing warty skin or something more interesting.
Secondly, he implies that he has had repeated contact with these extra-terrestrial beings; if he wants to get people to believe him, why has he not somehow recorded these meetings by hiding cameras or at least reporting each event as it happens?
I’m not saying that I definitely don’t believe in ‘aliens’; the sheer number of planets in the universe makes it mathematically unlikely that we live on the only habitable planet that exists. I’m also open to the idea that if there are alien races as developed as us then they, like us, probably indulge in a bit of space travel, so it is technically possible that ET may pop down for a visit.
I just think that the evidence for UFOs and related government conspiracy theories is so weak that, as of yet, there have been no ‘aliens’ on Earth. SH
The truth is, as they say, out there. Literally. Or, at least, the reports of it now are. Under the Freedom of Information Act, the Government has had to release to the National Archives previously classified and confidential military reports on UFOs. All that you now have to do is tap “national archives UFO” into Google and you’re there. Unfortunately, a lot of these seem to be written in ‘militaryspeak’ and are fairly unintelligible to the general public (I know I struggled), leaving only the simplified table versions as comprehensible.
However, even in these dumbed-down formats, the files provide some intriguing information. Some of it’s fit for a bloody good laugh, mind. Obviously if you’re drunk in rural Wales and see a far-off white thing on a hillside then yes, it’s pretty likely that you’re seeing a sheep. I’d call the local farmer on that one, not the authorities. Other reports are frustratingly vague, such as ‘lights’ or ‘something in the sky’. One of my favourites was the stunningly dense ‘the object was definitely unusual and was a possible UFO sighting’. Of course it was, love.
OK, OK, so we can all point and laugh at the nutjobs who think that they’ve been taken away by the little green men. But its interesting to note that one of the first documents that the National Archives’ UFO microsite directs you towards is a “briefing” document providing an overview. This document reassuringly states that 90% of UFO sightings can be explained as a result of everyday phenomena and are nothing to do with the extraterrestrial. 90%? Where does that leave the other 10%? Given that the records for 2007 show just over 130 reported UFO sightings, this leaves around 13 potential UFOs unexplained.
Most convincing, in my opinion, are the reports coming from pilots. Seeing as they spend a damn sight more of their time in the sky than your average person, I’d like to think that they’ve got the best idea of what sort of things can usually be found flying about up there. On April 23rd 2007, two separate airborne pilots saw two ‘bright orange/yellow’ objects in the skies near Alderney. OK, I can accept that one pilot could be mistaken, but two?
This seems to hark back to the days of WWII, when many pilots claimed to see strange, fireball-like lights which seemed to appear from nowhere and follow their planes – the infamously mysterious “foo fighters”. Originally assumed to be secret Nazi technology, it was later discovered that German pilots had experienced the same phenomena. As far as I’m aware, there has yet to be an explanation.
Yes, I do believe that aliens exist. Quite frankly, I think it’d be cocky not to. There are infinite stars out there, and therefore quite probably infinite other solar systems and planets. What are the odds that we’re the only ones? Put it this way – I’d not be rushing into Ladbroke’s just yet if I were you.
We launch exploratory missions into space, so why shouldn’t other species? Assuming that we’re the most intelligent bunch out there would be just as cocky. I mean, we’ve succeeded in potentially trashing our planet through global warming, have twice elected that cretin George W. Bush and are still infinitely fascinated by a box which shows us talking pictures. We’re hardly the fastest rocket ship in the galaxy.
Maybe not every UFO is an alien spaceship waiting to land, but with tons of unexplained sightings, how can we rule it out? ED

1. Mark
Just because 10% or so of UFO sightings are officially classed as unexplained by the RAF unit that investigates UFO sightings that does not necessarily mean that the Ministry of Defence or, at least, part of the MoD does not know what the sightings could be attributed to. The military is, by necessity, rather good at compartmentalising information within itself, the old ‘if you don’t need to know then you don’t get to know’ idea, and with sound reasoning. I think it’s fairly certain that most of these officially unexplained sightings can be attributed to flight and weapons testing of the next generation of aircraft, UAV and missile technology. Highly classified aircraft flying over the United Kingdom isn’t as far fetched as one might imagine, one need only consider that the UK has one of worlds most sophisticated and integrated air defence systems and a rather large number of unused, isolated and well maintained airfields, particularly in Scotland, that makes UK airspace one of the prime real estates for this sort of testing. It’s know widely acknowledged in military circles that the USAF tested the brand new B-2 Spirit stealth bombers and F-117A Nighthawks, and their prototypes, in the UK for precisely this reason. So image it’s the late 1970’s or early 1980’s and you see a dark, triangular shaped object with flashing lights performing complex aerial manoeuvres, considering that the military denies all knowledge of such an aircraft and experts testify that such an aircraft is not in service anywhere in the world then one could immediately assume it was a UFO of a possible extraterrestrial origin. Secondly also consider that the current fifth generational aircraft that are currently entering service, eg the F-22, Eurofighter Typhoon, F-35 and various Russian aircraft have been in development for decades. It was naive to think that their replacements have not already left the drawing board at an early prototype stage and are probably small, extremely fast, well armed, long ranged and unmanned (UAV’s), thus being unburdened of a human pilot the aircraft can perform aerial manoeuvres that go beyond that of 10g’s without risking losing control by means of an unconscious or injured pilot.
I would concur that we are almost certainly not alone in the universe and it’s likely that, given the number of probably habitable planets and evolutionary theory, we are almost certainly not the most advanced sentient beings around. Which is why I seriously doubt that any such beings would bother visiting Earth, I mean, why should they? Just what is here that would interest them? Milton Keynes? Cheap booze? Jerry Springer? I think it would be wishful thinking in the extreme to suggest that such unidentified flying objects are alien bur rather the more terrestrial, yet still equally fascinating, idea that they’re the prototypes of the next generation of military aircraft.
2. chris
Hey Mulder Mark ( or would you prefer mullah :)
We are not alone- can I visit the planet you come from? I have a few requests:
1. Does your Space Disc have provisions for sickie bags?
2. DO you solemly undertake not to do secretive operations on sensitive parts of my anatomy eg, ears ( I was recenlty attack by a guard duck in Cathays)
3. Can your Space Blob do trickes like the Watershoot at Porthcawl?
4. Is ist safer than the waterchute and supplied will the requirements of the Esteemed Intergalatic Accidenrt Prevention in Dodgy Aliens with access to Earth Phd course?
5. Do you agree X File dude that werewolves live in Merthyr Forest (in the mines which Thatcher closed down by using English police to attack miners who she said were the “enemy within”), that hairy men roaming the streets of Cathays on Fridays dressed as Union Student WArdens, when they are in fact Special Branch creations that squirt gum over vulnerable students and take them the the SAS base for military style torture?
Fe godwn ni eto! WE shall rise again!(In Mr Mulders Space Craft cleverly deign to look like a Nissan Micra?)
3. Mark
I really don’t know what’s wrong with you Chris, but I bet it’s hard to pronounce.
4. chris
You’d find it easy if you were an earthing.
5. Mark
No, seriously Chris, seek help.
6. chris
Thanks Mark, I always take your advice seriously, but I think you’re the one who needs to seek help ( I am all ears to teach you the principles behind global participatory democracy- well I am not COMPLETELY all ears thanks to the intervention of a guard mallard I may have mentioned once or twice somewhere).
7. chris
This is not an orginal thought; but was Jesus really an alien ( like the Queen as some claim)and his ascension was really teleportation? Just interested what the CU have to say.
8. Mark
Chris the phrase ‘I am all ears’ is usually taken to mean someone who has a lot to learn and is willing to listen to a person prepared to educated them. Whilst I agree with you that you have a lot to learn you have repeatedly demonstrated that you are either unwilling or unable to listen and comprehend relatively straightforward arguments. You are a man who was outsmarted by a duck. ‘nuff said.
9. chris
yeah, but to be fair, you don’t listen to reasonable arguments either. Socialism is scientific ananysis of class struggles, offering the only hope to a human people ruled by thr tyranny of Corporate and state sponsored capitals. And as for the duck, it was trained by Delta Force, the elite commandos of the USA Army.
10. Mark
Socialism failed everywhere it was tried, often with devastating human and fiscal costs, what makes you think you can make it work?
11. Gawan
hey Mark, so socialism had devesating human and fiscal costs? Fiscal hmmm. So the fact that under capitalism crops grown for export are allowed to rot in the fields to keep food prices high in the third world? You really don’t know shit about world economics do you? Oh and i’m sure the queen knows best wit hall those UFOs. The English haven’t made any decent contribution to aeronotics ever. hmm sopwith camel, that was a winner huh? Probably the worst biplane of the first world war. No wonder the red baron was an ace you tap the thing and it went down. Oh and I truely think extraterrestrials have been probing your bum, likely taking your brain out through it. Oh and on a last note the US Military with all it’s high tech engineering still sucks ass. 3 F-117A Nighthawks were shot down with old soviet SAMs over serbia during the kosovar war (Vive el communismo!). Oh and 5 more crashed from mechanical failures. Damn that leave 4 servicable aircraft in the squardron. Hope no B-2s in Missouri got taken out or that’s just more capital wasted. Seems like a great fisal and human loss, boo hoo!
12. Mark
Admittedly Capitalism isn’t perfect, and the global food shortages we are currently experiencing is evidence that something needs to change, but I suspect its peoples attitudes that need changing not the global economic system. Besides it’s doubtful that Communist could do any better given its record on food management, the mass famine’s in Communist Russia and Moaist China spring to mind.
The F-117A is a 25 year old aircraft and, despite only 60 ever being made and flying thousands of combat sorties in four different operations only one has been lost in combat, over Serbia. I don’t know off hand how many accidents involving Nighthawks there have been but let us take you at your word and say five, despite there being only one loss over Serbia, that still only makes for a 7% accident related loss for the entire fleet over a 25 year period which is, frankly, pretty damn good.
The UK has never produced a worthwhile contribution to aeronautics? Off the top of my head I can think of such famously distinguished aircraft as the Spitfire, Hurricane, Typhoon, Lancaster, Mosquito, Meteor, Canberra, TSR-2, Buccaneer, Comet/Nimrod, Harrier/Sea Harrier, Hawk, Hornet, Wellington, Hunter, Javelin, Jaguar (with France), Lightning, Merlin, Swordfish, Tempest, Tornado (with Germany and Italy), EF Typhoon (with Germany, Spain and Italy), JSF Lightning II (with USA), Victor, Vulcan and Valiant, Venom, Vampire, VC-10 and the Wessex. These are just the aircraft I can think of now, and unarguably some of the finest aircraft of their time and type.
And the Camel wasn’t a bad aircraft, and the reason the Red Baron killed so many Allied Aircraft was because he was a f*cking good pilot. Re the B-2 Spirit since being delivered in 1993 it has seen service in three wars, Serbia, Iraq and Afghanistan, it has suffered no combat losses and only one aircraft has ever been lost in an accident, in Guam not Missouri.
13. Rachel
“The English haven’t made any decent contribution to aeronotics ever. hmm sopwith camel, that was a winner huh? Probably the worst biplane of the first world war.”
Faints
I don’t know why you’ve come to this opinion, but I 100% disagree with you, and hope that you come to your aeronautical senses very soon!
For a start, the Eurofighter Typhoon would not be in existance today if it were not for Britain’s involvement. And if it’s particularly the English you believe not to have contributed to aviation, I’ll start by saying that it was the English who developed the probe and drogue method of air-to-air refuelling, which is now used world-wide, (for example for France’s Mirage and all USAF helicopters).
It would take forever to discuss every British plane, but I had to at least respond briefly to your ridiculous comment.